In case youse unfamiliar with Viz, make it so. A good starting point is the Wiki entry – a feast of fun in itself.
Trying out Alfie’s Voice
… that’s not Lilly Allen’s little bro’ you understand. It’s Bill Naughton’s eponymous hero – handy word, that – of his book and movie.
Now here’s a tip for you. If you’ve got a bit of the hump, do something a bit new. Not maybe completely new, as it might be hot-air balooning … now why did that pop up ? … oh yeah, but I’ll come to that later.
Well yesterday I fair had the hump, I did. To do with what’s coming up at a meeting this evening. More to the point, what I’m going to bring up … if I can be arsed. I swing from obsessing about it, to thinking: why give a fuck ? No-one else does. What’s it all for ?, kind of thing. I’m about as popular there as if I walked into the Cowley Road mosque chomping on a bacon sarnie and swigging a can of Kestrel. Which we’ll also return to.
But Cowley Road does come into this. What I did was I went to the ‘Oxford Arts Group’ from that Interweb thingy ‘Meetup’ that’s all the rage nowadays. Continue reading “More Shit on Toast”
‘Honest, Guv – we ain’t no subversives’ Sadly, that’s the truth. Last night [written 28 October 2002] on BBC2, True Spies, the first in a series on the extent of the i…
Source: ‘True Spies’
‘The Beer Went Mad’
Lynn Truss, in her ranty book, Talk to the Hand – which tries to do for everday personal interactions what her earlier book did for grammer an speling – quotes some remarks on their actions given by convicts to the cultural conservative and prison shrink Theodore Dalrymple:
‘The beer went mad’
‘The knife went in’
‘Something must have made me do it’
‘My trouble came on again’ (this uttered by a serial church burglar and arsonist).
He characterises remarks like this with the useful phrase ‘locutions of passivity’. Continue reading “Promoting Passivity 01”
The Term and the Figure ‘The Troll’
We’re all supposed to respect “community”, and – of course – respect itself. The negation of these warm and cosy things is often said to be ‘trolling’. Wikipedia is interesting on the origins of this; as is so often the case with etymologies, it’s not at all clear as to where it came from. There’s a fishing practice which involves dragging a lair along beneath the ship, and it’s documented that in 1972 US Navy pilots would go ‘trolling for MIGs’ ie try to decoy the fighter planes defending the Democratic Republic of Vietnam against the American invaders. Continue reading ““Trolls””
A Prescient Passage from Metamorphoses
Ovid, Metamorphoses, Bk Xll, Melville trans.
Remind you of anything … does it?
... Here Rumour dwells, Her chosen home set on the highest peak, Constructed with a thousand apertures And countless entrances and never a door. It’s open night and day and built throughout Of echoing bronze; it all reverberates, Repeating voices, doubling what it hears. Inside, no peace, no silence anywhere, And yet no clamour of voices, but muted murmerings Like waves one hears of a remote sea, Or like a far-away thunder rumble, When Jove has clashed the rain-clouds. Crowds throng its halls, mobs of liteweights That come and go, and rumours everywhere, Thousands of them, false mixed with true, roaming to and fro, And words flit by, phrases all confused. Some pour their trash into idle ears, Some just pass it on, and as each Gossip adds something new so the story grows. Here is Credulity, here reckless Error, Groundless Delight, Whispers of unknown source, Sudden Sedition, Overwhelming Fears. All that goes on in heaven or sea or land Rumour observes and scours the whole wide world.